This Newf Reviews: The Rip 'em Watermelon

Today is Thursday, and I think we all know what that means. But just in case you don't - it means it is time for me, like the Egyptian goddess Maat, to weigh treats and toys on my scale and determine those which are worthy, and those which are not.

Maat usually weighed the human heart on her scales, of course. But just last week, in an eerie coincidence, the treat I reviewed was a pig's heart. What I'm basically saying is, I'm a god. I'm betting Wimsey would agree with me - why SHOULDN'T we be elevated and worshipped? Humans could, and have, done a lot worse for themselves. Don't even get me started on Tezcatlipoca.

Anyway - while I have a short backlog of treats I could review, I feel like it is time to introduce another toy to my stable of Newf-Approved playthings.

I've done a lot of web-trawling - working my paws to the bone to bring you a toy that I sincerely hope will bring tears of joy to the eyes of one of my very favorite dog bloggers.

Wally-my-matey, this one's for you.

THIS NEWF REVIEWS: The Booda Rip 'em Wa(lly)Melon


Here's why I think it is the perfect toy for my BFF (black furry friend) Wally.

1. It is a wallymelon.
2. It was MADE TO BE DESTROYED! Seriously - the wedges are all attached by velcro so you can pull it apart and then your human can stick it back together again! And it makes a fabulous ripping noise when you detach a wedge that I am told drives most dogs crazy with joy.
3. It is a wallymelon.

There are no squeakers in the wallymelon, but two of the sections have rattles inside them so they make rattle-y noises when you shake them.

Company Standards: This is a Booda toy, but unfortunately we can't find their website online to discover what their standards are. However, we are told that they have very high quality assurance standards, and that they often replace or refund toys that do not meet those standards, so that's good.

Size and Portability: If we are not mistaken, the wallymelon comes in several sizes. The largest we have found we found here. That site says that the wallymelon is 12" in diameter. But they make a bunch of other rip 'em toys that are suitable for smaller dogs if any of you are smaller than, for example, me. Let's face it, most of you are. I'm not bragging, it's just the truth.

Newfie Drool-o-Meter Rating*: After due consideration, and let me stress the fact that this is based on web-viewing and not actual practice, I'm giving this toy a one-slinger. The fact that it is squeakerless troubles me. I am sure the velcro rippy noise probably makes up for it - but until I sink my teeth into it, I'm sticking by my rating.

Hear that Booda? If you want me to change my mind, you're going to have to send me a wallymelon rip 'em gratis, alright?

Stay cool, dogs!

*Newfy Drool-o-Meter Key:

Dry Mouth: Zero interest or appreciation for the item in question - not worth drooling over.
Minicicles: Just the tiniest hint of a droolcicle starting at either corner of the mouth. Drool worthy? Barely.
One-Slinger: The treat is good - good enough to get the juices flowing but not so good that I would offer it as an aperitif on a first date with Sunshade.
Two-Slinger: Now we're talking! The drool is even, it's sling-able, and it has been earned.
Simultaneous-Ropes-to-the-Floor: The highest honor I, or any newf, can offer a treat or toy. So delicious and delightful that the drool flows like water.